Banned in the UK

[lovingboth]

In looking for the backups for my Brain, I've refound a sketch that was banned by the Lord Chamberlain. He (or, in practice, his staff) was in charge of stage censorship in the UK until it was abolished in the late 1960s.

It was intended to be in a show called 'Guarding the Change' at - I think - the Lyric Theatre Hammersmith

Britannia:

Our dearest & most beloved subjects, people, compatriots and allies.

It pleases us to be here in your country especially in this dear & well-beloved season of the spring /summer /autumn /winter in order to carry out our duties at this investiture /opening /funeral /wedding /signing of death warrant.

We declare this bridge /dam /arsenal /baby farm open /closed /independent /abolished /knighted.

Let Empire /Commonwealth /Loose Association of Nations with common interests /partners in trade /bitter enemies rest assured our thoughts /good wishes /carpet salesmen /aircraft carriers are on their way towards you.

And so on this beautiful morning /afternoon /evening, what else is there to say, but hallo /how-do-you-do /goodbye/ well done /arise Sir Robert Menzies!

Hmm, hardly desparately dangerous stuff, but obviously too disrespectful of royalty for 1965!

Comments

[booklectica]

I think that must be the sketch Clive James wrote while at Cambridge, as mentioned in May Week was in June. An incredibly funny book, by the way.

[lovingboth]

Having browsed MWWIJ in a charity shop this afternoon, you're right. I'm very impressed: how long ago did you read it?

When I'm looking for something like this, I browse from the back, looking only at the right hand page scanning for a few key words. (It stops me starting to read the thing properly.) Of course, then it turns out to be on page 33 out of 200-odd.